1. Sex keeps you connected.
Sex is a deeply powerful form of intimacy. Of course, there’s casual sex and one-night-stands, but these aren’t usually considered “intimate”. That’s because once you’re in a relationship, there’s usually love involved.
Sex then becomes one of many… albeit the most pleasurable and significant… ways of expressing it.
When you first met, there was likely a very strong desire to have sex with each other. Once you started having it, you probably couldn’t keep your hands off each other. Right?
During this phase, you want to spend every waking minute with your partner. You can’t get enough of each other. Most people would agree that this is the most exciting and blissful time in your relationship.
But alas, then there are kids, and careers, and in-laws, and they start to encroach on this bliss. Then, before you know it, you are living as roommates, instead of lovers.
Sex is what brings you back to how it all began. Once you stop having it, you lose the intimacy. After you lose the intimacy, you lose that connection to one another.
The stronger the sexual connection, the stronger the emotional intimacy will be.
When you have sex with your partner and enjoy it, you produce the hormone oxytocin. Oxytocin is known as the “bonding” and “cuddling” hormone because it makes you feel closer to each other.
The more sex, the closer you will feel, and the greater the connection.
2. Sex can make both partners feel great.
If you’re doing it right, and are with the right partner for you, sex feels great. In fact, it is one of the most pleasurable experiences you will ever have. Period.
If you don’t enjoy sex or see the need for it, then you might want to ask yourself why that is. Billion dollar industries are built around sex for a reason. They know that deep down…
There’s nothing better than great sex… when you have it!
When you’re enjoying great sex with your partner, you are both happier and feel better about yourselves and your relationship.
The happiness comes from the “feel good” chemicals and hormones that are released during sex and orgasm. These include, but are not restricted to, endorphins, serotonin, adrenaline, and oxytocin, to name a few.
And who doesn’t want to feel good?
3. Sex fills the needs of both partners.
We are sexual creatures. Although, men and women express their sexuality in different ways.
For men, their sexual performance is part of their masculinity… their manhood. It’s how they express themselves. Sex gives them validation. It makes them feel good about themselves.
Which is why sex is so important to men.
Women have multiple ways (just as they can have multiple orgasms) to express their sexuality and femininity. They can have sex with their partner, and they can conceive and give birth to a child, and also nurse their child.
For women, these additional experiences provide a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment, that men can never experience. Since we have these other ways to express our sexuality, we may not be as focused on just the sexual aspect.
Regardless, sex for women is still a need and one that has to be fulfilled, for us to be truly joyful and content.
Feeling loved, respected and appreciated are also needs, but your partner is more likely to provide these if his sexual needs are being met.
4. Sex can make life together more enjoyable.
People who have happy sex lives are simply happier than those that don’t. When couples are having enjoyable sex, then life’s troubles are more manageable. That’s because you are in a more positive place to deal with them.
Sex is an opportunity to experience pleasure, to reduce stress and to increase intimacy.
You’ve probably heard of someone saying about a guy: “Man, he’s grumpy. He probably needs to get laid.” I don’t doubt it. Even if sex isn’t the solution to all his problems, it would certainly cheer him up! Am I right or am I right?
The same applies to women. You can’t have an orgasm and be angry or stressed at the same time. It’s impossible. I can honestly say that the more sex I have, the nicer and calmer I am. When I don’t have it, I can get kind of bitchy. True story.
5. Sex in your relationship can reduce the likelihood of infidelity.
Let’s face it, if your needs are not being met within the home, you might go outside of it to get it. I’m not saying you’re justified, I’m simply saying that it becomes more of a temptation.
A man desires a woman, and a woman desires to be desired.
If a woman is sexually neglected or rejected, she will feel undesirable. She will wonder if she is still attractive to her partner or if there’s something wrong with her. She may even question whether he still loves her.
This is going to be especially devastating if she is under the belief that men always want sex. This can lead her to be vulnerable to the attention and affection of another man. He doesn’t even have to be anyone special, he just needs to show an interest in her. And when he does… she will fall for him.
That’s because he makes her feel desirable again.
For a man, they also need to feel desired by their partner, but a man’s sexuality is expressed mostly through sexual intercourse. That’s not to say that if he doesn’t “get any”, that this gives him licence to cheat, but it does make it harder for him not to.
That’s because his inability to have sex threatens his masculinity. Then he is equally vulnerable to another woman filling the needs that his partner isn’t. In this case, his self-confidence is on the line. Without that, he’s not going to feel good about himself.
Most affairs by men appear to be all about the sex, but that’s just because that’s how he gets his validation.
In a lot of cases, the “other” woman isn’t any prettier, or any skinnier, or any anything, more than his wife, but she does make him feel like he is special and that will make him feel good again.
The Bottom line: A dwindling sex life is not a good thing. It can be indicative of a health or hormonal issue or a deep underlying relationship issue. All of which need to be addressed to have a happy, healthy life and relationship.
Make time for sex and be sure to have it!
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